Friday, November 22, 2013

11 Things You Should Never Wear to Work

Who What Wear posted 11Things You Should Never Wear to Work and provided this handy infographic as a reminder:

The thing is, after looking at this, I can’t say that I agree with all of these choices.  Or maybe even any of them. 

I understand the inclusion of body-con on this list because the idea is not too look too sexy at work.  But, are we talking my idea of body-con or somebody else’s idea of body-con?  Because my idea of body con is a sweater dress:

Old Navy Snakeprint Sweater Dress

And sure, it’s a bit risqué, but I'd totes wear this to work.

However, somebody else’s idea of body-con might be a latex catsuit:

Darque "Rubber Look" Cat Suit via

This, this is probably NOT okay for work.  I won’t say definitely because I don’t know your life, but probably.

Like latex body stockings, fishnet body stockings are probably not okay, unless your work involves you starring in a Lady Gaga video.  But, as Jess from Animated Cardigan said on Pinterest, there is a classy way to do fishnets so I wouldn’t give up on them.


Is this you?

Are you Daisy Duke?  No?  Then leave the cut-offs at home.   

What’s that?  You work in the Florida swamp as a gator-wrangler and cut-offs are not only accepted, but encouraged?  Well, then, by all means, please proceed.

Panty Lines
Here’s the thing about the office.  They want you to wear proper underpinnings (see # 11) but they don’t want to knowyou’re wearing proper underpinnings.  Your underthings should be like rebar in a bridge; it’s there keeping things in place, but no one sees it.

Flip Flops
Tim Gunn says no one looks sexy in flip flops.  And he’s right.  But we’re not supposed to try to look sexy at work (see # 1) so I say wear flip flops.  It’s better than having your boobs out!

Wet Hair
What?!!  This is bull$#&+!!  I go to work with wet hair all the time because I don’t use, or even own, a blow dryer.  Clearly this “rule” is meant only for people with an interest in using modern technology. 

But, if I don’t wear hats I could catch cold from riding my bike with wet hair!

Hot Pants
I personally don’t see anything wrong with Hot Pants:

I mean, I understand that inflatable clothes aren’t the most professional, but they do help to slenderize those problem areas!

This makes me laugh because sheer was a pretty big trend last year and all of the fashion magazines were full of advice on how to make sheer work for the office.  Apparently those halcyon days have passed so put it away, kids!

Oh, Isabel Marant is going to be so sad about this one.  She “invented” these:

Image via

 (Please note that if I spend $700 on sneakers, I’m wearing them everywhere so I don’t look like the ass who spent $700 on shoes that are appropriate only for the weekend).

Strapless Bra
What if I like strapless bras?  What if I like the thrill of knowing one or both of the girls could just pop out at any time, without warning?  What if I like having to hike my bra up every 10 seconds?  What then, huh?  

As you can see, I don't exactly agree with everything on this list, and there are actually a couple of items I think they left off.  One is bare midriffs and two is overalls.  These two items are never okay in the office.  Well, they're not okay unless, of course you wear them together because you miss the 90s.  That pairing is obviously okay and completely work appropriate.

How about you, Reader Friends?  Do you agree with these “rules”? Anything you'd like to add to the list? 

Happy Friday, All!


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